Watch your mouth!


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"Wink wink nudge nudge know what I mean say no more" this is pretty much what SL is for many people. I mean you know... Sex. Why is that?

But it's not about that as well. It's about when someone is not interested but the SL "common sense" says "nah, ALL want sex". I'll give you a few personal examples:

I danced at a club and this guy told me he as a police officer thinks my ass should be illegal. My reaction was asking him if that line EVER worked on anyone...

I log in after a long hard and a sad day of going to the hospital with my grandmother. After pushing her on a broken wheelchair that nearly broke my back. I sit I want to rest and I'm in pain inside out and outside in. This guy I knew and we were acquaintance to say the least was asking me for a photographer's lesson. I did promise I'll teach him long ago and I wanted to keep my word. So I gladly say yes and call him. Only to hear his voice changing while I tell him about my horrible day into sighing and moaning to see he turned on his camera and asking me if I want to see?! (Blocked guy, if you're reading this... yeah... DON'T do that)

A suggestive message saying "let’s hang out... all over each other". Not from a stranger, not from an acquaintance but from someone who knows me and knows me well enough to know I'm not going to reply with how high to the command jump.

All these three examples happens EVERY SINGLE DAY in SL all the time. But the problem is, I know some that will read this post will look at example 3 and will say, but it's a light joke. It is not a light joke. It is telling me, I'll snap my fingers; you'll open your legs. It's disrespectful in more ways than one.

My reaction to the first example was to laugh at him and show him he's ridiculous. My reaction to the second was blocking him. But my reaction to the thirs was, because it is someone I know, to ignore the remark at first, then an emotional reaction came and only after 24 hours I shook my head at myself (and my head was shaken and smacked by oethers too) and left him a message telling him in a clear way what I think of that cheap remark followed by cutting any ways of communications (aka block). But why? Why was I at first ok with this? Why are we ok with those sexual remarks? If they would have come from a real friend, we would be slapping that friend. A co-worker would find himself in a lecture about boundaries and losing his job. Why is it that in sl the things that are clearly not ok in rl, are ok here.

In my sl past there's a forced kiss, countless sexual remarks, suggestions, at one point an angry guy I rejected, reacted with filling my IM box with a full description of a raping me and beating me up. The shield a screen brings to some people.

Now, allow me to say this. I'm talking as a straight woman. But men are not the only ones that do this. In disbudding this subject I was told about a woman sending nude rl pictures out of the blue. It's not about gender. It's about sex and sex and only sex. I'm wondering out loud, I know I'm not the only one that was willing to take that kind of a treatment; question is why in sl we are more forgiving?

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