I'm going slightly mad


Skin: Glam Affair Luna skin - Jamaica Tone - 08
Eyes: IKON Immortal Eyes - Storm
Hair: no.match NO FATE Pack of REDS on Hello Tuesday 
Mask: Chimeric Fashions Snarling Asylum Mask (Black) Peatonville Asylum Items From MadPea Productions
Outfit including Shoes: MadPea Productions Gold Package Female Outfit Peatonville Asylum Items
Wheel Chair and Dreippers Lamp: Zerkalo Peatonville Asylum Set Peatonville Asylum Items From MadPea Productions
Lobotomy table and Operatin Lamp: Junk Set for Peatonville Asylum Items From MadPea Productions
Medical cart and Meds: Second Spaces - Peatonville Asylum - medical cart Peatonville Asylum Items From MadPea Productions
Hydrotherapy Bath and Shock Therapy Box: Culprit Set for Peatonville Asylum Items From MadPea Productions
Cupboard: Serenity Style Peatonville Medicine Cupboard for Peatonville Asylum Items From MadPea Productions
Sinks: keke bathroom - dark
House: unKindness Abandoned Loft

Yesterday I made these pictures you see. MadPea Productions are running an amazing Halloween dark themed game and the prizes from the best designers inworld are on that topic: Asylum. In the pictures, as you can see, I am seen seated on a wheelchair in a dark cold hospital room with a mask covering my face.
I was told today that the pictures were insensitive that I wasn't thinking about people who are suffering from mental illness. To that I say, how dare you? ALL my pictures are made with a meaning. A message, a title, a shadow everything I make in my pictures is for a reason. So let me explain what those pictures are about.
When I was 24 my body turned on me. I was athletic, I was hyper I was with a good job and everything and my thyroid glance just stopped working. Not slowing down, but stopped. I was having a rough time in my life as it is, so I didn't relate my mood to a physical problem. The mood turned to a depression. 2 years of it. I was tired and I couldn't sleep, I wasn't hungry and I wasn't eating yet I didn't lose weight. The 5 hours daily aerobics, I couldn't handle 15 minutes now. To a point I was walking down the street and I couldn't care less to be hit by a car. 2 years that when I saw my parents I was smiling and stuffing my face with food in family dinners to a point that one day I got sick and ran to the bathroom and when I came back my mom asked me if I casued myself to do that... (I admit, it was something I did as a teen and in the army a lot).
I was shutting myself up knowing that something is wrong with me because I felt ashamed. I had just moved in with my then bf, today my husband, and I thought I was just not handling "grown up" life well, so I was hiding my feelings when what I needed was help that eventually I got.
My 2 years, for other people it's their life. Depression is a desieas. A horrible one that kills people. It's not a melancholic feeling, it's not just sadness, it's like cancer eating away on your life. Every person that lives with it another day is a person deserve the most admiration and support and love and understanding.
When I took those pictures I was unease in my chair because I was touching a point in my life that I'm not happy with. But it's there. For other's it's not a "point in life" it IS life.
I was going to write a post about those pictures after I took them, but just taking them took all the energy I had so I was waiting. I guess I need to thank the person the judged me pictures like that for giving me back the energy needed to write that post.
When you read about let's say Robin Williams, don't think “oh what a shame” “why did he do it why?” Admire him for making it this far. Admire him for fighting his illness.